Yesterday, I watched as once again, it was proved that it is more important to have heart than talent. It was the poorest showing by a Cowboy team in the biggest game that I can remember. The worst part is that this team is indeed very talented, and this year, the NFL is as wide open as I ever remember it.
As I sat watching the game (if you want to call it that), I cam up with some nicknames that I thought might be appropriate for several of the players that graced the Cowboy’s roster this year. Enjoy:
Tony Romo– “Intentional Grounding Gump“- There is so much to consider with this guy. He can not seem to hit the broad side of a barn, and when ever teams keep him in the pocket, he has no idea what he should do. The whole ‘golly-gee’ bit was cute at first, but he needs to realize that he is now a $60,000,000 quarterback on the biggest team in sports. I really wonder about how bright he really is. I keep expecting him to tell Adrea Kramer that ‘life is like a box of chocolates.’
T.O.- “Big Mouth”– Shut up and catch the ball every now and then.
Roy Williams- “Big Nothing”- And, that’s exactly what the Cowboys got for their trade with the Lions.
Flozell Adams- “Big Early”- No one commits as many illegal motion penalties as the big guy.
Jason Witten- “Little Early”- No one, that is, except for our starting tight end.
Andre Gurode- “Surprise!”- He has the uncanny ability to surprise defenses as well as his own quarterback with his ill-timed snaps. And, if Romo looks ready, he’ll just snap it right over his head.
Nick Folk- “90 Degrees”- Possesses the strange quality of being able to kick the ball at a right angle. This is not so bad for Cowboy fans though, because in this case the opposing team only gets to start on the 40 yard line.
Sam Paulescu- “Minus 20”- This name refers to the 20 yards that the Cowboys give up in field position because this guy is punting instead of Matt McBriar.
Pacman Jones- “Latitude”- He only runs East/West.
Terrence Newman- “Tunnel Vision”- This refers to Newman’s innate ability to stick to a receiver like glue. watching his eyes intently as the ball sails over his own should and into the receiver’s arms.
Miles Austin- “What The Hell Were You Thinking On That Pitch!”
Feel free to leave any that you might think of.
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