Why the Hell is Paula Abdul Still on the Show?

Find my latest American Idol article here.

The first thing that caught my attention was Paula’s dress on last night’s show.  Where did she think she was?  I assumed that she would be attending a state dinner after the show or that the Oscars had drastically moved up their schedule.  That dress was ludicrous.

At several points during the show she would appears to be intoxicated as she would wave to the audience, list to one side or the other, and slur her speech.  Last night, her problems were particularly obvious.

She should thank Simon for cutting her off so much, because last night he did not, and this led to some of the worst attempts at using language since man first spoke a word.  He (Simon) let her go on when she commented about Brooke’s performance.  I quote:  “I enjoyed this performance so much more than last week’s.  And, what…uh, what… uh, what… ‘i’ (?), what’s great…, this is the great thing.  You know this season we really wanted, and we’ve always wanted…, uh, contestants that…, uh, are unique and have their own niche.  And, you do, and it’s…, it’s…, I can hear your voice in one [some guttural sound at this point that sounded like ‘phew’]…, one note and know it’s you, Brooke.  So that’s a great thing, and I think you’re consistent.  This was great.”  Paula then shook her head smugly at this concisely delivered bit of wisdom as poor Brooke stood there with a courteous, but still dumbfounded look on her face.

Later, in praise of Michael Johns she gushed, “I…bet you’re happy that you came through this…learned to sing this…song from the year you were born.  You were probably dying knowing you could do that.  It’s fantastic.

The funniest part for me came after David Cook performed.  She stood there and announced that she was so excited, she could not sit down.  She gave some intelligible comments, but as she drifted toward the edge of her verbal ability, the audience took the part of Simon and courtesy-cheered her into silence.

Please, please get rid of Paula.

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2 Responses

  1. paula rocks. she is the only reason i watch American idol.

  2. i will tell you why Paula is still on the show. 1. she is a very good judge. she has picked every single winner. simon has picked only one. she has a Very good eye for talent. 2. she is very entertaning and makes for amazing TV and huge ratings. 3. American Idol gets 90 % of its publicity thanks to her. she gets almost all the attention, good and bad. Idol wouldnt survive without her, trust me. She is ratings and publicity Gold.

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